It was a Friday when I first gathered the resolve to delete my Facebook account. Tired of the mindlessly angry statuses from people I knew in high school and the strange compulsion I feel to check it every hour (conservative estimate), I clicked the 'deactivate' button.
Propelled by straight up internet rage at that point, I also deleted the Facebook app on my phone and tried to create a whole new identity for myself that involved literature and fields of grass.
Saturday was hard. I woke up and was checking my email when I remembered what I had done. There was a little black spot on the screen of my phone where once sat that charming blue "F" icon. What if someone I stalk posted pictures? What if I got an event invitation? It didn't matter, I told myself, because today will be full of real things like
I got out of bed and began driving to my parents house for a little visit when my car broke down. As I waited at the nearest gas station for my dad, all kinds of statuses ran through my head.
"Amanda is probably going to be riding bikes a LOT more after today."
"Amanda is apparently sitting near a beehive because a swarm of bees literally just circled my car, stingers ready and waiting."
"Amanda is throwing up gas station horchata. Bad life choices are all over the place today."
I could tweet them, I thought, but who would care? My one spam account follower? Resigned to keeping my thoughts to myself, I put my phone away and spent the next 20 minutes staring and people and trying to discreetly look away when they caught me staring.
That weekend I was all about starting a revolution. I nearly talked almost three people into deleting their pages, even. So, as you can imagine, it was a sad Monday morning when I realized what a fool I had been to shun the online world and came back. I can't do that to myself again.
(Image via weheartit)
3 comments:
facebook and blogs. forever embedded into our psyches.
amanada hi! here i am, at your blog. i dont even update my status that often. but i suddenly think of everything in life as a status update when the thought to delete my fbook enters my head. good to know your first-hand experience -- i'll learn from it.
"...and tried to create a whole new identity for myself that involved literature and fields of grass." So, so funny. I love your blog.
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