Friday, January 15, 2010

A post in which I excessively use footnotes

Each day, as I sit in the office and try to make up tasks for myself*, I grow more and more socially awkward. It begins from the time I walk into the features nook and decide if "Hello" or "Good morning" would be more appropriate. It usually comes out as "Hellorning."

From there it generally speeds downhill as I internally debate what, exactly, I should be doing and whether or not I should speak to my co-workers/editors**. Then I compulsively drink water bottles until it is 5 p.m.; at which point I can gather my belongings, whisper "Goodbye" and get out of the elevator on the wrong floor and wander around until I find my car as the other writers drive by, undoubtedly puzzled at why I look like a crazed hobo searching for shelter in the parking garage.

Oh adult life, you're more than I ever dreamed. I commute. I take a lunch (but only when I don't feel awkward about asking to leave. DO I NEED MEDICATION?) I wear office appropriate clothes. This little charade ends come May and is it wrong that I just want to go back to school?



* A conversation that just occurred in my head: "Hmmmm what can I google that looks as if I am doing research when I am not? How to crochet? That might prove useful. But can I make it look like I am NOT, in fact, googling crocheting lessons? Probably not. I guess I will just refresh CNN again to see if they have posted any stories about celebrities because THAT is what I choose to be interested in, not important things like the crisis in Haiti. Which is very sad. It just doesn't make time pass by as quickly as fashion/music/scandal."

** Not because I don't want to, but because my track record is not very good. I generally walk away from conversations re-playing them and cringing at myself for spewing out sentences like "Um, like, that's too funny. Ha." SERIOUSLY?

1 comment:

alison said...

i lol'd all over this post. and so did mackenzie who was reading it over my shoulder.